The call came at 9.06am.
"Sweetie, guess what? Guess what," Em's voice palpable on the end of the line.
Looking back I can admit that my guesses of "what" were far-fetched.
As I hadn't had time to check any news websites I figured I had missed the news that either penguins had finally announced they were our commandeering the planet as our new overlords or we had been left a substantial financial windfall following the death of a donkey that had in turn been left a heaving bank account from a UK-based relative neither of us knew existed.
An explanatory note needs to be added here. According to a friend there are more millionaire donkeys in the UK then anywhere else following because dying and angry donkey owners, disgusted how they are treated by their money grubbing family decided en mass to rewrite their last will and testament and leave all their money to their dearly beloved donkeys -- and they say cat people are crazy.
Like I said, my guesses were wrong.
"Our permanent residency has come through," Em gleefully squealed, although I am sure she will deny squealing and replacing my adjective with perhaps "gleefully and calmly said".
My stomach churned, tears crept into my ducts and it felt as though someone had planted a heaving right-footer into my nether regions.
"So this is what relief feels like. Odd. I imagined this feeling to be more like being spooned by brown bear as you fall asleep and less like teaching one to tango after a salmon fishing outing," I thought.
But the truth is I could never have predicted this feeling.
It's one part comfort, one part jubilation and one part pride that a country sees us fit for inclusion, that a consular official thinks we would make good Canadians.
I have held Canada in high esteem since my childhood discovery that the difference between America and Canada was that the latter is the mature, intelligent and kind family member of North America while the former is a petulant spoilt child.
Thanks Canada. We will do you proud.
In honour of the news I have started learning the national anthem and finally realised that the lyrics aren't "we stand on God for thee" but "we stand on guard for thee".
It makes much more sense that not everyone who lives in Canada is agnostic.
Does this mean I am allowed to start saying eh? now?
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